Mushrooms have to be one of the singularly most divisive foods ever discovered by humanity. For as many people that love them, there are just as many (if not more) who find them completely awful and want nothing to do with them. So, as a resident member of the second group, let me explain to you what exactly is wrong with mushrooms.
Seriously people, we need to talk about mushrooms.
They're spongy and flavorless.
And the second they get added to anything, you can tell.
Did you know that mushrooms literally break down dead plant life?
They're actually neither considered plant nor animal. SO WHAT ARE THEY?!
We don't even know why they grow towards sunlight (seriously). You're practically eating an alien life form.
Don't believe me? Scientists actually believe their spores are capable of SPACE TRAVEL!
Not to mention that the spores can literally stay dormant for centuries. CENTURIES!
Not convinced mushrooms are the worst yet? Keep reading...
They're even considered a different taste on the taste spectrum!
Just look at these weird-ass things.
Why would anybody want to eat something that glows in the freaking dark?
Literally no vegetarian I've ever met has been okay with a portobello mushroom as a substitute for meat.
I'm really not sure we should eat anything that can also be a dye.
Or that people use as freaking packing material!
Seriously, mushrooms are the actual worst.
