Being a parent is a messy job. From diaper duty to sick babies, you have to be ready to clean up all sorts of mess at any given time. After finding what she believed to be a dead mouse in her child's bed, Laura Mazza, is drawing the line when it comes to gross clean up duty.
After being shared over 203,000 times, it's clear that this post has the internet breaking out into laughter.
"Today I saw a mouse in my sons room. A mouse. Stewart Little has decided to come in my house and set up camp near my sons drawers. (Not his pants American people, his clothes drawer thing) I saw it and I froze And it was the kinda freeze that you feel like you shouldn't even breathe. Where your air escapes your lungs," she recounted on her hilarious Facebook post.
She begins thinking about her plan of attack, when her daughter innocently stumbles into the room.
"I'm trying to find my pulse again when my daughter decided to strut into the room with her toddler swag and I screamed no! And it wasn't just any no. It was the loudest noooooooooooooooooooooo I've ever made in my life.So I shut the door and I leave little Jerry (Tom's mate) to his own devices."
It's time to call for backup- because that's exactly what I would do too.
"I decided to call my husband because there's a mouse in the house, and when there is a mouse in the house other than blow torching the house down there isn't much in the way of rational thinking. He answers the phone and I say "mouse" I stutter because I'm fucking terrified. This is no Mickey Mouse okay. This is ratatouille but smaller and he isn't making some delicious soup, he's gonna spray out pebble poo and make babies everywhere and in my sons ears and they'll crawl in my mouth... mouse in my mouth!!!
"Huh?" He says
"Mouse in house" I say still shaken
"Cat in hat" he replies.
"No babe, there's a mouse in Luca's room! You need to come home NOW and take it outside!"
"Oh Bub you just take it outside, or just kill it"
"Kill it???"Obviously this guy hasn't seen the movie 'Witches' where the witch turns into a mouse after eating soup and gets stomped on by the chef and green pus sprays out.
"There are children in the house, your children. You need to come here. I can't save them"
He laughs. He thinks I'm joking."
That was no help. It's time for this mom to take matters into her own hands.
"So I hung up on him. Because obviously I'm alone in this. I'm alone and I need to be the brave one... so I take a couple of swigs of whiskey and say "okay Laura, today is the day you will fight your biggest fear in life and remove a dead mouse from your house" I said this about 10 times in the mirror before and slapped myself a few times before I bolted down the door and went charging in like a knight in shining armour with a piece of paper screaming like the warrior woman I am and charge up onto this dead mouse in my house and I realise ..." she wrote.
Instead of it being a terrified dead rodent, it was in fact one of her son's toys. From there, she did what any rational mom would do- vowed to never tell a soul about what happened.
"I realise it's not a mouse.
No, not a mouse at all...
It's a tiny leopard...
A tiny toy leopard.
I nod to myself and say "we shall never tell a soul about this"
My husband got home 4 hours later and asked me how I went...."I said mate, I handled that shit"
Well now the mouse is outta the bag..."
I can't stop laughing, because I could totally see this happening to me! And other reader's agreed.
Has something like this happened to you? Share in the comments below.